And Then, There's Henry...

Every day I collect strange and interesting data to write about in my blog. Mostly it comes in the form of making mental notes when other times I actually mention it to Justin that I ought to write about it. Henry is one of those topics that simply had to be written about. Henry. What can I say about the ol' fella? Henry means well but he's just not good at getting the job done. I'd say he sucks but that is certainly not the case.

For those of you who know me, you are quite aware of how I love to putter around the house, cleaning and tidying things up. Upon moving into a new house I delve into the task of making the house a home by cleaning, organizing, cooking - doing all of those things that make the home smell like you and the foods you like, placing things in reasonable places, putting those final touches on a room so that it eminates your personality. It is job enough to do this with your own things. However, when you move into someone else's house, with thousands of trinkets and knick knacks, odd pieces of furniture in bizarre locations, strange household items, etc., the job becomes seemingly insurmountable and can drive you to absolute tears. At least it did me. I hadn't really thought of everything for the first week I was here. Discovering what was in the cupboards, what things would be of use to me, what cleaning products I could find to use, those were the things I was focusing on. So, my first attempt at doing a deep cleaning of the house wasn't until after my first week here. Needless to say, with a 7 year old and a dog, the first thing I needed to do was vacuum. Now, allow me to digress just a bit to give you a picture of what the place is like. When you enter the house from the front, you walk into the dining room and in all honesty are absolutely captivated. The room is stunning with beautifully designed stained glass windows, an enormous table that can seat up to 12, and luxurious carpet. The carpet takes you through to a tiny living room-like room, through to the water closet, up the stairs and onto the landing. Alternately, you can walk straight through the snug into a small but modern kitchen, into an extension of the kitchen (difficult to explain purpose) and finally through to the sun room. There are two bedrooms on the second floor, a study and full bath. The third floor is a single attic bedroom (otherwise known as "Chay's room"). The thick, luxurious carpet is found throughout the downstairs with the exception of the kitchen and sun room, into the water closet and up through the stairs and landing area. The study upstairs is also carpeted. Although we are careful to remove our shoes upon entering the house, we somehow manage to drag crumbs, hair, dirt and strange bits throughout. So vacuuming - or hoovering, sweeping or cycloning, depending on your preference - is where I was. And indeed, what I needed to be doing to care for the carpet, keep the house clean and free from dust. Of course, with a house full of high quality, very expensive wall-to-wall carpeting one would gather that there would be a decent vacuum cleaner made available to keep it all in tip top shape. (Especially considering the house was full of all of the knick knacks, trinkets, furniture an dishes.) That, I determined, was nothing short of a silly assumption.

Upon investigating the two very small under-the-stair closets I found him. He was short, squat, red and was wearing one of the cheakiest grins I'd ever seen. And his name was Henry. A little worse for wear, the little fella still promised to cheerfully delve into his job. How wrong was I?! Henry turned out to be the bain of my existance! Short, squat and red I can handle. The worst part was that he didn't suck at his job! I found myself running the carpet attachment over and over the carpet trying to pick up a dog hair (or hell, even one of my hairs!) was back breaking work. No, Henry would simply not do. So, after a day of hunching over Henry scraping the carpet with every conceivable attachment trying desperately to clean the carpet, Justin decided I was right and we were off to the ATM to reduce even further my ever-shrinking bank account. Of course we found a suitable replacement within an hour. And I'm loving every second of it!

Sorry Henry, LG's in town now and determined to put you out of business! ;)